Hidden: Dubh Súile Speaks

D: My name is Dubh Súile mac Alasdair.

A: No, it is not.

D: We’ve been over this, A.

A: I know, but how can you open a post with that? It isn’t your name (name changer)!

D: I thought you were going to give me the floor today.

A: Oh. Yeah. Sorry. Go ahead. I’ll shut myself up in this blue box over here. Gee, I wonder what that – wheeee!

D: That she roams free upon this earth startles me.

I am Dubh Súile mac Alasdair. Some know me and say that I am kind. Others say that I am powerful and merciless. Others still see a battle-scarred young man whose father – a king of his people – was slaughtered before his eyes.

Then there is me. There is the me I show to you all, the me that exists here within the mystical lines and dashes of code that make up the internet. There is the me that exists within the stories A has allowed herself to see and write thus far. Then there is the me that she has yet to write. She has seen glimpses, and she has shared them with you in poetic form as she searches for more ways to feel who I am. As she looks deeper within the soul she has carried in her head for these many years, the me that is will begin to shine.

I was born in 668 near Loch Ussie in what is now Scotland. My people and their history are gone from this world, but we were princes once. We counseled kings, and won for them wars. We were apostate, yet monks of Rome taught our young together with venerable Druids. I was raised to join them, these priests of dying gods. I was taught to be the greatest of their number, and lead them, while my brother would lead our clan.

Instead, I ran away.

I was young, foolish and in love. I was betrayed and saved in one breath. I lost and was not gracious in defeat. Time tempered my soul – time, war and a journey into myth that afforded me as much as it stole from me.

Now I no longer run.

Who am I? What is in the hidden window of my soul?

I am Dubh Súile mac Alasdair and I am powerful. I am the son of kings. The blood of old gods flows in my veins yet I alone control my destiny.

I am merciless, but I will not countenance suffering nor allow treachery to take root in my heart.

I am tender and know love well. The memory of my Mairead’s touch warms my soul, and I smile, although it is through tears.

I walk alone. Doubt brought me to my knees, and duty has torn me from the side of all those who were dear to my heart. I risk much to right old wrongs and see to it that those who come after me may walk freely upon this earth.

I am Dubh Súile mac Alasdair and I am flawed. I am human.

The heart of humanity is resilient and I have watched it beat unfailingly throughout these many centuries – and it beats within this old body, yet. It carries me through the deepest terrors of my soul and gives me hope that one day A will finish my tale and allow my journey to end. When she does, I will finally be at peace.

Hidden: Dubh Súile Speaks was brought to you by The Queen Creative’s Prompts for the Promptless: Johari Window.

Check out these other offerings for this week’s prompt:

• Bastet and Sekhmet: http://bastetandsekhmet.wordpress.com/2013/10/23/the-johari-window-bastet/
• Serendipity: http://teepee12.com/2013/10/24/prompts-for-the-promptless-a-visual-johari-window/
• TheMatticusKingdom: http://thematticuskingdom.wordpress.com/2013/10/23/on-the-path-of-a-jester/
• Fish Of Gold: http://fishofgold.net/2013/10/23/johari-quiz/

PS: This is the last Prompts for the Promptless of Season 3. Season 4 starts up again on January 7!